01
What meaning is not
- It's not a silver lining.
- It's not "at least…"
- It's not getting over it.
02
Three places people often find it
The psychiatrist Viktor Frankl wrote that people find meaning in three ways. The first is what they give or create. The second is what or who they love. The third is how they carry suffering they can't change. You can read more on three places meaning comes from.
03
A gentle way to start
Answer one of these, in writing, when you're ready:
- What did this person (or thing) bring into my life that I want to keep going?
- Who else is carrying this loss with me?
- What do I know now that I didn't know before?
You don't need an answer to all three. One is enough.
04
When it's not the right time
Right after a loss, meaning can feel like an insult. That's normal. If weeks turn into months and you can't eat, sleep or get through the day, that may be more than grief. Talking to a doctor or a licensed therapist is a good next step.