You sit down to log something, and the entry turns into two pages on your mother. Or you log nothing for a week, since nothing seemed important enough. Or you start giving each day a score out of ten.
Less goes in than you would expect.
01
What to track
The moment. A day, a place, who was there.
The order. What set it off, what you took it to mean, what you protected, what you did. A line each is plenty.
When you noticed. During, an hour later, the next day.
02
A question to watch with
Each rule's entry has one question for watching it. Use the one that goes with your working guess. Four of the nine, as examples:
For Output, where the fear is that without achievement you don't matter: what did you do within an hour of finishing something?
For Peace, where the fear is that someone's disappointment means you did something wrong: what did you agree to today before you'd finished hearing it?
For Strong, where the fear is that if they see you struggle, you lose the only standing you have: when did you say you were fine today?
For Burden, where the fear is that your needs make you too much, and too much gets left: what did you decline, or not mention, today?
03
What to ignore
How well you are doing. A day with three catches is not a worse day than a day with none.
Why. The explanation can wait. An entry is a record of what happened.
What the other person did wrong. It may be true. It is their side, and tracking it keeps your attention off the only side you can see clearly. The exception is anyone you have reason to be afraid of. What they do is not something to ignore.The National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233. If tonight is an emergency, call or text 988 (US). This library is not that door.
Anything that takes more than a few lines. Long entries tend to be the story, and the story is the part you already had.
04
What the entries are for
They are what subtraction works from. Entries from work, from home and from an ordinary good day can show whether what was named accounts for all three. A handful that keeps not fitting is worth as much, and may mean there was not enough to tell the first time.
What a catch is like while it is happening is on When You Catch the Rule in Real Time.